Saints Row 2 Harry Potter Style!
by Adrianus Dirk
Summary: What if the main protagonist in Saints Row was none other than Harry James Potter? Rated M for extreme violence Mainly from Gat, of course! Read and Review or I'll sick the Saints on you!


Disclaimer: The following story, although written by myself, is property of THQ Inc., Volition Inc., and J.K. Rowling.

**CHAPTER I**

**JAILBREAK**

I was blinded by a very bright light. I blinked, only then realizing I wasn't wearing my glasses. I groped around on my bedside table.

"Where are my glasses?" I asked the blurry shape which I assumed was a nurse.

"They're right here," she said, handing them to me.

I put on the glasses, then took in my surroundings.

"Where am I?" I asked.

"You are in the infirmary of the Stilwater Penetentiary, Mr. Potter," said the nurse, "You've been in a coma for ten years."

Just then the doors to the infirmary burst open. Another nurse was pushing a gurney into the spot next to mine.

"Who's this?" asked the head nurse. "And what happened?"

"Carlos Mendoza," said the other nurse. "Shanking."

"It hurts!" said a voice that I assumed belonged to Carlos.

The nurses treated the boy's wounds, leaving me to dwell on the current situation. When the nurses were done, they left the infirmary to do something else.

"Is it really you?" asked Carlos.

I looked at the boy.

"Do I know you?"

"I'm Carlos. I heard you were down here so I decided to help bust you out."

"Keep your bloody voice down!" I hissed.

"Sorry, man!" said Carlos. "I'm trying to help you! Just trust me!"

"Ya know what I got last time I trusted someone?" I asked him. "Blown up!"

"I just got myself shanked so I could see you," he said. "Doesn't that show I'm loyal?"

"It shows that you're dumb enough to let yourself get stabbed."

"Do you want off this island or not?" snapped Carlos.

"Of course I do," I said.

"Then let me help."

The infirmary doors opened and a doctor walked in, writing notes on a clipboard. I looked at Carlos, who nodded. Slowly, I slipped out of bed. I sneaked up behind the doctor and stunned him nonverbally.

Carlos walked up next to me. "Do you want to sneak out through the roof, or charge out the front?"

"Do you think I took over Stilwater by sneaking around?" I asked. Not waiting for an answer, I opened the double doors that led to the rest of the prison. Two cops stood in the next room, talking. I pointed to one of them.

"_Stupefy_!" I yelled.

The officer crumpled to the floor. Obviously confused, the other officer stood there before realizing what just happened.

"Get on the floor, now!" yelled the cop, pulling out his pistol.

"Why don't you make me?" I retorted.

The cop pulled the trigger. I blocked the bullet that flew towards me with a silent shield charm. I pointed at him.

"_Expelliarmus_!"

The cop's _NR4_ flew out of his hand and into mine. I aimed for his leg and fired. He collapsed, screaming in pain.

I handed the gun to Carlos.

"There's a weapons cache this way," said Carlos, pointing toward a gate.

"All right, Carlos, lead the way."

I followed Carlos through the gate and up a set of stairs. In the next room were more guards. I took them out with a wave of my hand.

Up another set of stairs and we came into an office area. I took out the remaining guards. Then we headed for the door labeled Armory.

Carlos turned the knob. The door wouldn't budge.

"Well, you can't expect them to keep it unlocked, can you?" I asked him.

I put my hand on the doorknob.

"_Alohamora_," I said, and turned the knob.

The door opened to reveal walls of guns.

I scanned the list on the wall:

1. Night Stick

2. Pepper Spray

3. _NR4_

4. _SKR-9 Threat_

5. _AS14 Hammer_

6. _Tombstone_

7. _AR40 Xtnd_

8. _AR200 Saw_

9. _McManus 2010_

10. Flash Bang

11. Hand Grenade

I looked at the weapons on the walls. Then I noticed a door that was labeled: _SWAT Only._ I turned to Carlos.

"Grab a duffle and fill it," I said. "I'm gonna load up with the big guns."

I walked over to the door, unlocked, and walked into the next room. It was filled with heavy artillery. I checked the list on the wall:

1. Stun Gun

2. _Holt 55 _(_Kobra)_

3. _GAL 43_

4. _XS-2 Ultimax_

5. _AR50 w/ Grenade Launcher_

6. _Annihilator RPG Launcher_

7. Satchel Charges

I grabbed one of each gun, excluding the _Kobra_ and _GAL 43_ which I grabbed two of, and the _Satchel Charges._ I left the room to find two cops each aiming an _NR4_ at Carlos, who, I noticed was unconcious.

"Hello, officers," I shouted. "Looking for me?"

One cop looked from me to Carlos and back.

"Get him."

I stunned both of them. Then, I switched my jumpsuit for a police uniform. I revived Carlos who swapped his suit for a uniform as well. Then we cuffed the guards and threw each one into a seperate locker.

"Thanks for getting me out of that," said Carlos, who was admiring his new police uniform.

"No problem," I said. "But let's not celebrate till we get off this island."

We walked casually out of the prison and into the open air. Our plan went pretty smoothly until another cop, not recognizing us, asked who we were. I stunned him when he began talking into his radio. Knowing that reinforcements would come, we ran for the docks where Carlos had a boat stashed.

"Take out any choppers and boats that follow us," shouted Carlos, when we got on board. "I'm gonna get us out of here."

I pulled out the _AR50_ and waited. I heard a helicopter flying overhead. I aimed at the chopper and pulled the trigger. I put a shield charm on the boat, so the explosion wouldn't sink it.

"There's an attack chopper coming up behind us!" yelled Carlos. "If it's not taken down soon we're dead!"

I watched as the chopper shot a missile at us. I held out both of my hinds.

"_PROTEGO TOTALUM!_"

The rocket hit my shield charm, causing an explosion so big, it destroyed the attack chopper along with all other pursuing vehicles.

"I've got good news," said Carlos. "We've arrived. Also, that explosion was awesome."

I turned to my new friend and saw something strange behind him.

"That's the Row?"

"It is now," said Carlos.

"Merlin, when did this happen?"

"When Ultor got involved."

"The clothing company?" I asked.

"After Hughes was killed the that bombing of yours, Ultor picked up the pieces," said Carlos. "Now, they're everywhere. On T.V., billboards... Hey if you ever forget what Ultor is, all you've gotta do is look towards Saints Row and you'll see that frickin' eyesore.

"What're you gonna do now?"

"I'm gonna start by finding the other Saints and --"

"What other Saints?" asked Carlos.

"What're you talking about?" I said.

"Once the Brotherhood, Ronin, and Samedi showed up, the Saints fell apart," said Carlos. "Look, I know you didn't ask for it, but my advice is to just lie low. Buy yourself a drink and soak up as much information as you can."

"Thanks, Carlos," I said. "I owe you one."


End file.
